bingobetty86
Joined: 12 Jan 2007
Posts: 71
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 Posted: Wed Mar 21, 2007 2:57 am Post subject: Jokes |
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Hi
I thought I'd share some of my bingo jokes and see if you all have have to share. I'm not sure if this is the right section to post them but they do entertain.
What has a whole bunch of little balls and screws old ladies?
- A bingo machine.
PAT and MICK were playing Bingo.
Pat kept looking over Mick's shoulder saying, you've got that number mark it off, you've got that number mark it off.
After putting up with this for some time Mick got annoyed and said, "why don't you do your own sheet !?"
Pat replied - "I can't it's full !"
The 10 commandments of Bingo
Thou shall not sit in thy neighbors lucky seat.
Thou shall not stare at thy neighbors card.
Thou shall not take the Callers name in vain.
Thou shall not call false "Bingo".
Thou shall not wish bad luck on thy neighbor.
Thou shall not threaten to kill the "Caller".
Thou shall not steal thy husband's money for Bingo.
Thou shall not brag about how much thou hast won.
Thou shall not whine about how much thou hast lost.
Thou shall not covet thy neighbor's winnings.
hehe
Betty |
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visionadi
Joined: 12 Jan 2007
Posts: 65
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| Posted: Sun Mar 25, 2007 3:10 am Post subject: |
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this isn't really a joke but I actually tried it out at work!
Do you keep falling asleep in meetings and seminars? What about those long and boring conference calls? Monotone voices burbling on and on like a creek for hours on end, forcing you to look for the nearest sharp object or length of wire to end it all. Here's a way to change all of that...
1. Before (or during) your next meeting, seminar, or conference call, prepare yourself by drawing a square. I find that 5"x5" is a good size. Divide the card into columns-five across and five down. That will give you 25 one-inch blocks.
2. Write one of the following words/phrases in each block:
synergy
strategic fit
core competencies
best practice
bottom line
revisit
take that off-line
24/7
out of the loop
benchmark
value-added
proactive
win-win
think outside the box
fast track
result-driven
empower
knowledge base
solution
touch base
mindset
client focus
paradigm
game plan
leverage
synergy strategic fit core competencies best practice bottom line
revisit take that off-line 24 / 7 out of the loop benchmark
value-added proactive win-win think outside the box fast track
result-driven empower knowledge base solution touch base
mindset client focus paradigm game plan leverage
3. Check off the appropriate block when you hear one of those words/phrases.
4. When you get five blocks horizontally, vertically, or diagonally, stand up and shout "BULLSHIT!" |
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